The Disney theme parks have always been expensive places, designed to suck as much money out of exasperated parents’ wallets as possible. Whoever called it “The Happiest Place on Earth” must have been referring to the people who own Disney stock. At least we got our revenge with ‘John Carter.’

Disney, however, may have gotten the last laugh.

The company has raised the prices for regular passes for their California parks by just over 10 percent and even stopped charging less for children ages 9 and under. Could things be more expensive? Just in case any of these not-so-real situations happen to you, here’s how to know if Disney is getting too overpriced.

1. Because of one hug from a guy in a Mickey Mouse suit, your kids aren’t going to college.

2. The giant Epcot ball has been “blinged out” in 14 karat diamonds.

3. The ghosts in “The Haunted Mansion” lost their collective bargaining rights.

4. All the countries in the World Showcase asked the European Union for a bailout.

5. A sign in front of the entrance to Space Mountain reads, “You must have a net worth this high to ride.”

6. The company’s board of directors used Walt Disney’s head to keep the champagne chilled during their annual retreat.

7. Disney refuses to cover Goofy because his clumsiness is considered a “pre-existing condition.”

8. Taking the monorail requires a “co-signer.”

9. To keep the “Mad Tea Party” ride running, Disney had to let the Koch Brothers sponsor it.

10. Three words: ‘John Carter 2.’

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